Hajj Reflection #26: The cemeteries in Haramain

Never forget to pay your respects to the martyrs, companions and solehins by visiting the Ma'ala and Baqi' cemeteries in Makkah and Madinah respectively.  Cemeteries are not places of worship, but are places that humble us and remind us how fragile life really is.


In Ma'ala, we were pointed out Saidatina Khadijah's burial spot, where a tree could be seen growing next to it. No one admitted planting the tree there, thus it must have grown on its own; as if to shade Saidatina Khadijah's burial ground - MasyaAllah!

At that very spot, I was moved, thinking that approximately 150 metres away from me laid the remains of one of the most honourable women in the world.  She was and will always be my idol - of whom my father had named me after, as I was given birth on Maulidurrasul, 12th Rabi'ul Awal.  This was the woman who stayed true to her husband at all times and believed in him (a prophet) when no one else did! May Allah provide me with the strength He presented her with.  

In Madinah, we walked to the Baqi' cemetery which wasn't far from Masjid An-Nabawi. Here, we were told of a hadith by Tirmidhi:

It was narrated that Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said: “Whoever can manage to die in Madinah, let him die there, for I will intercede for whoever dies there.”

Upon returning home, I related the hadith to my children and how I long to die in one of the two holy lands. My youngest son (10) was quick to say that despite it being the most honourable place, he'd be very sad if he wasn't with me when I was on my death bed.  I coaxed him into believing that the ultimate is in His hands and we live only to seek His mercy and guidance. With that, he nodded, smiled and leaned to kiss me, an indication that he no longer resented (I hope!).

In retrospect, while it is ideal to die in the holy lands, we should mainly aim to die in husnul khotimah (a good ending). A useful supplication, perhaps, is the one read by Prophet Yusuf:

 
فَاطِرَ السَّمَاوَاتِ وَالْأَرْضِ أَنتَ وَلِيِّي فِي الدُّنْيَا وَالْآخِرَةِ ۖ تَوَفَّنِي مُسْلِمًا وَأَلْحِقْنِي بِالصَّالِحِينَ
(O Thou Creator of the heavens and the earth! )Thou art my Protector in this world and in the Hereafter. Take Thou my soul (at death) as one submitting to Thy will (as a Muslim), and unite me with the righteous.
(Yusuf: 101)

Hajj Reflection #25: In act of Zuhud

Leave worldly matters behind, keep personal matters personal. Hajj is the time for us to practice zuhud (to leave things which distract you from Allah the Exalted and high).

When performing hajj, it is best that we leave all our valuables at home, in the care of Allah swt. This includes our children, parents, friends and all material objects. Hajj is not the time to worry ourselves sick about the well-being of our beloved ones; especially when we are in the best place to make du'a for them.

Neither is it the place to flaunt our expensive shoes nor largely print the titles that precede our names on our baggages. For some, their positions, careers and wealth are their precious lives that they speak, subconsciously of (I am sure), about nothing but these worldly matters.

On the contrary, some kept their true identities from others, and I knew that their secrecy was simply to avoid unnecessary praises that may lead to riya', Alhamdulillah. A dato', a datin, a medical doctor or a philosophical doctor; we are all in the holy lands to please none other than the Lord Almighty.
 

Thus, you should not grieve over anything you miss, nor be proud of anything He has bestowed upon you. Allah does not love those who are boastful, proud
(Al-Hadid: 23)

May Allah purify our hearts, cover our defects, forgive our sins and let the last of our deeds be the best!

Hajj Reflection #24: Coughing in the Haramain.

When performing our ibadah, we should accept any ailment as a form of kaffarah (compensation for our sins). To cough while in the Holy lands is a norm, or more rightly so, is expected. Why not, as it is not only the weather that is different, but so are our daily activities, our diet and the amount of people we get in contact with.

The coughing scenario, if observed, is sometimes hilariously entertaining. I remember during a few occassions, while we were listening to our tazkirah sessions in the hotel lobby, one person would start coughing. In an instant, it would be echoed by another person, then another, and another and another. I think perhaps 8 - 10 people would be joining in the coughing orchestra. And in a few minutes, the orchestra would stop and not a single person would be found coughing.

For some, the cough also comes with a fever, a cold, runny nose or migraine, to name a few. Some are tested with more severe conditions: unexpected heavy menses, weak bladders or even heart attacks.

No matter what the ailments are, the question is whether we are able to keep calm and persevere during such trying times? To not sigh, complain or resent being unwell? Believe me, it is not tested upon us as a punishment or torture, na'uzubillah, but as a form of washing away our sins. The pain or condition serves to close the gap between us and Allah, making us closer to Him as we seek His mercy and healing. He knows best!

 

No kind of calamity can occur, except by the leave of Allah: and if any one believes in Allah, (Allah) guides his heart (aright): for Allah knows all things.
(at-Taghaabun: 11)

Hajj Reflection #23: Helping the blessed elderly

Many people perform their hajj at the later stage of their lives simply because that's when they are more spiritually prepared. Furthermore, the wait has allowed them to make the necessary financial savings for the trip.

In general, most of the hujjaj in our group were above 50 years old. Comparatively, I was considered young even though there were younger couples in the group. Furthermore, going 'alone' meant I was able to help those who were in need of assistance as there was quite a number of elderly widows within the group.

The experience of going for hajj with them was humbling as it taught me to appreciate the fragility of life. It taught me patience, tolerance and love. Some were inexperienced, some suffered various conditions (gastritis, cancer, etc.), some needed a boost of confidence while some others needed constant motivation. So Allah willed me to help them whenever I could: a hand to the mosque or shops, a lead during tawaf or even an ear to hear their woes. Thus, Allah programmed that each of us became companions to the other, subhanAllah! We were not alone!

A few of them have gained a warm spot in my heart. They have become like sisters or mothers to me. Although some may live miles away, technology connects us and I know that I will cherish the special ukhwah built in the name of Allah.

N.B.   May Allah forgive my sins and accept my ibadah, as well as protect me from any evil...

Hajj Reflection #22: Travelling 'alone'

You are NEVER alone. This entry is especially for those who do not have a spouse or friend to go for hajj with. Do not fret, for Allah is always with us, just as Allah had said to our Prophet:

O Prophet, sufficient for you is Allah and for whoever follows you of the believers. 
Al Anfal: 64
 

After the demise of my husband in 2007, I sought advice from those more knowledgeable and pious, whether it was permissible for me to perform my hajj without a mahram. Once satisfied with the answer that I could, I was more than adamant to go. However, friends and relatives were a bit dubious about it, "You're going ALONE?"

In my humble opinion, I knew that I would never be alone. Firstly, physically, I would be amongst the other ladies in the group I would be going with. Secondly, spiritually, I would have Allah everywhere I go, especially when I am in His House, in the Holy land, subhanAllah... If I sought His help, guidance and rahmah, surely He would look after me and protect me from any evil or harm because He is our Lord the Almighty!

Once, I met a Malay woman who prayed next to me while waiting for Zohr. After we had completed our solat sunats, she told me that she was lost and whether I could help her. She was not familiar with that part of the mosque as her hotel was in the opposite direction from mine. Apparently, on that day she had decided to perform her tawaf sunat with her group members (following a mutawwif) instead of with her husband. Upon completing her tawaf, she realized that she had somehow gone off track and lost her group.  She began to panic. She had always relied on her husband so she really didn't know her way around the mosque.

I was stunned to hear her story. I had heard about people losing their ways in the mosque and here was one, sitting in front of me. For me, the kaabah is the compass that helps us know our bearings. "Which part of the kaabah do you see, upon entering the masjid everyday?" I asked. She said she didn't know. She always followed her husband. Her husband would know.

Alhamdulillah, she had written down her husband's mobile number in her notebook (her mobile phone had run out of battery). Hence, I lent her my mobile phone for her to call her husband, asking him to pick her up at Bab AlFath, door no.42 after Zohr. She was ever so thankful to me and even offered a couple of riyals for allowing her to make the call. I asked her to keep it and told her that she need not feel afraid and scared because she was in Allah's special House, Masjidil Haram! Ask for His help and He will help you!

Thus if you think that it will be difficult for you to travel to the Holy Lands without knowing anyone beforehand, think again.  Physically, Allah always guides and protects us by granting us with a 'supportive authority' (Al Isra: 80) in the form of friends, acquaintances and strangers.  He had blessed me with excellent companions, group members and roommates, Alhamdulillah.  

Alone? Never, in syaAllah!

Hajj Reflection #21: Do you know some Arabic?

Learn Arabic! I started my formal classes in Arabic when I was 13, but I wasn't really good at it. However, a technique my dad taught me since I was young helped.

My dad used to assign us pieces of du'a to learn from time to time. When memorising, he'd ask us to break them up by drawing lines after each word or phrase, and write their translations underneath. Alhamdulillah, as a result, I was not only able to memorise supplications, usually from the Quran, but I also knew what they meant.

The habit continued. In most cases, the memorisation process gets easier because my vocabulary has grown. Otherwise, words are translated and planted in the heart.

Today, I am still unable to fluently converse in Arabic or understand a full lecture in this holy language but being able to understand the gist is very refreshing. When in the holy lands, I have to remind myself (often too late) to never ask the locals ANYTHING in Arabic because once they start responding, I'd be the one lost and dumb-folded!

Having said that, on one occasion in Madinah, my limited Arabic vocabulary saved us from being cheated by a shopkeeper!  I was walking along the shops with my room-mate who was keen in buying one of those mini laptops that read the surahs from Juzuk Amma. I asked the price in English, and the shopkeeper said '20 Riyal.'  So my room-mate began to examine the item, while considering whether to buy or not.  Suddenly, two Turkish women came up and asked for the price in Arabic.  What did the shopkeeper say? 'Khamsata 'Ashara' which meant 15! Astonished, I looked at the shopkeeper and said, 'Khamsata 'ashara?'  His face turned red when he realised I understood, and quickly apologized and lowered the price.  I grabbed my room-mate's hand and fled.

Perhaps now I should pick up the language where I left so that I can understand the Quran better and hopefully, be able to follow it more closely, in sya Allah ♥