Hajj Reflection #23: Helping the blessed elderly

Many people perform their hajj at the later stage of their lives simply because that's when they are more spiritually prepared. Furthermore, the wait has allowed them to make the necessary financial savings for the trip.

In general, most of the hujjaj in our group were above 50 years old. Comparatively, I was considered young even though there were younger couples in the group. Furthermore, going 'alone' meant I was able to help those who were in need of assistance as there was quite a number of elderly widows within the group.

The experience of going for hajj with them was humbling as it taught me to appreciate the fragility of life. It taught me patience, tolerance and love. Some were inexperienced, some suffered various conditions (gastritis, cancer, etc.), some needed a boost of confidence while some others needed constant motivation. So Allah willed me to help them whenever I could: a hand to the mosque or shops, a lead during tawaf or even an ear to hear their woes. Thus, Allah programmed that each of us became companions to the other, subhanAllah! We were not alone!

A few of them have gained a warm spot in my heart. They have become like sisters or mothers to me. Although some may live miles away, technology connects us and I know that I will cherish the special ukhwah built in the name of Allah.

N.B.   May Allah forgive my sins and accept my ibadah, as well as protect me from any evil...

Hajj Reflection #22: Travelling 'alone'

You are NEVER alone. This entry is especially for those who do not have a spouse or friend to go for hajj with. Do not fret, for Allah is always with us, just as Allah had said to our Prophet:

O Prophet, sufficient for you is Allah and for whoever follows you of the believers. 
Al Anfal: 64
 

After the demise of my husband in 2007, I sought advice from those more knowledgeable and pious, whether it was permissible for me to perform my hajj without a mahram. Once satisfied with the answer that I could, I was more than adamant to go. However, friends and relatives were a bit dubious about it, "You're going ALONE?"

In my humble opinion, I knew that I would never be alone. Firstly, physically, I would be amongst the other ladies in the group I would be going with. Secondly, spiritually, I would have Allah everywhere I go, especially when I am in His House, in the Holy land, subhanAllah... If I sought His help, guidance and rahmah, surely He would look after me and protect me from any evil or harm because He is our Lord the Almighty!

Once, I met a Malay woman who prayed next to me while waiting for Zohr. After we had completed our solat sunats, she told me that she was lost and whether I could help her. She was not familiar with that part of the mosque as her hotel was in the opposite direction from mine. Apparently, on that day she had decided to perform her tawaf sunat with her group members (following a mutawwif) instead of with her husband. Upon completing her tawaf, she realized that she had somehow gone off track and lost her group.  She began to panic. She had always relied on her husband so she really didn't know her way around the mosque.

I was stunned to hear her story. I had heard about people losing their ways in the mosque and here was one, sitting in front of me. For me, the kaabah is the compass that helps us know our bearings. "Which part of the kaabah do you see, upon entering the masjid everyday?" I asked. She said she didn't know. She always followed her husband. Her husband would know.

Alhamdulillah, she had written down her husband's mobile number in her notebook (her mobile phone had run out of battery). Hence, I lent her my mobile phone for her to call her husband, asking him to pick her up at Bab AlFath, door no.42 after Zohr. She was ever so thankful to me and even offered a couple of riyals for allowing her to make the call. I asked her to keep it and told her that she need not feel afraid and scared because she was in Allah's special House, Masjidil Haram! Ask for His help and He will help you!

Thus if you think that it will be difficult for you to travel to the Holy Lands without knowing anyone beforehand, think again.  Physically, Allah always guides and protects us by granting us with a 'supportive authority' (Al Isra: 80) in the form of friends, acquaintances and strangers.  He had blessed me with excellent companions, group members and roommates, Alhamdulillah.  

Alone? Never, in syaAllah!

Hajj Reflection #21: Do you know some Arabic?

Learn Arabic! I started my formal classes in Arabic when I was 13, but I wasn't really good at it. However, a technique my dad taught me since I was young helped.

My dad used to assign us pieces of du'a to learn from time to time. When memorising, he'd ask us to break them up by drawing lines after each word or phrase, and write their translations underneath. Alhamdulillah, as a result, I was not only able to memorise supplications, usually from the Quran, but I also knew what they meant.

The habit continued. In most cases, the memorisation process gets easier because my vocabulary has grown. Otherwise, words are translated and planted in the heart.

Today, I am still unable to fluently converse in Arabic or understand a full lecture in this holy language but being able to understand the gist is very refreshing. When in the holy lands, I have to remind myself (often too late) to never ask the locals ANYTHING in Arabic because once they start responding, I'd be the one lost and dumb-folded!

Having said that, on one occasion in Madinah, my limited Arabic vocabulary saved us from being cheated by a shopkeeper!  I was walking along the shops with my room-mate who was keen in buying one of those mini laptops that read the surahs from Juzuk Amma. I asked the price in English, and the shopkeeper said '20 Riyal.'  So my room-mate began to examine the item, while considering whether to buy or not.  Suddenly, two Turkish women came up and asked for the price in Arabic.  What did the shopkeeper say? 'Khamsata 'Ashara' which meant 15! Astonished, I looked at the shopkeeper and said, 'Khamsata 'ashara?'  His face turned red when he realised I understood, and quickly apologized and lowered the price.  I grabbed my room-mate's hand and fled.

Perhaps now I should pick up the language where I left so that I can understand the Quran better and hopefully, be able to follow it more closely, in sya Allah ♥

Hajj Reflection #20: Sadaqah

Do as much charity (sadaqah) as possible; monetary or physical(smiling included :)). Yet, it is important that we give sadaqah for the pleasure of Allah as the reward is for the hereafter and not for human acknowledgement or worldly rewards.

And do not favour others in order to receive more.

 (Al-Mudathir: 6)

 In actual truth, I had begun to practice the art of giving sadaqah more frequently approximately eight months before performing my hajj. It included giving sadaqah to those I felt uncomfortable with, such as the beggars who walked up to my house gate every month, or those who stopped me as I approach my car with an excuse of a donation. Issues such as scams and the eligibility of the person making the pledge often cloud my mind. Slowly, I was able to push all negative thoughts aside and just focus on the act of sadaqah itself.  

In terms of the amount we give, it is often said that giving RM1 is better than nothing.  However, I am of the opinion that when giving, if it won't even feel a pinch, then why not raise the bar?  This, however, must be done in istiqomah and ikhlas.  For me, I raised both the frequency and amount.

 Now, imagine being able to give sadaqah in the holy lands - MasyaAllah! I tried hard to make it a habit there, to give sadaqah to the cleaners in the holy mosques and in the streets, on a daily basis. There were also opportunities to tip any mutawif, and even fellow hujjaj, Alhamdulillah. Every time I reached my own target at something, such as completing an umrah or reciting the whole Quran, I ensured I gave more as a form of appreciation and gratitude to Allah swt.

 Ergo, after a month of this amazing process of purification, I came home wanting to tip everyone who crossed my path! SubhanAllah, I notice that I have become more generous and definitely less calculative (especially with my children!).

 O Allah, I beseech You for sustenance (rezq): abundant, good and lawful-from the sustenance You own.

 NB: May Allah forgive me for my sins and protect me from any form of evil or feelings of riya' for sharing a very personal practice of mine

Hajj Reflection #19: Knowledge Preparations

Seek knowledge, be it from books, audio/visual CDs or the knowledgeable (mu'alim). Equip the self with knowledge, for with it comes wisdom.

 In a recent 1433H hujjaj assembly organised by Tabung Haji, it was revealed that studies show that there are four areas frequently asked about: circumambulation (tawaf), menstruation, paying penalty (dam) and the (13) prohibitions during ihram. Year upon year, attempts are made to simplify the teachings of these popular topics so that everyone can comprehend and master them, without having any doubts when performing hajj. More books are published - in colour, with diagrams, charts and pictures. Subhanallah... yet many are still ignorant, vague or dubious.

 Absorbing the massive amount of theoretical input needs to be done with utmost sincerity and with an open mind. Sandwiched with feelings of utter humbleness and desperation in seeking His help and blessings to ease the hajj experience, I believe wisdom will come naturally. With wisdom, one will be more confident and composed in executing ibadah; thus easing the entire process of hajj, if not life in general.

رَّبِّ زِدْنِي عِلْمًا

O my Lord, increase me in knowledge.

 (Tahaa: 114)